Page 11 - PC Fall 2023

Connection
Reflections from Naked & Unashamed
A Candid Conversation about Sexuality
A seminar discussing sexuality was held at University Community Church in Windsor, Ont.
presbyterian.ca
FALL 2023
PRESBYTERIAN
11
James Waddell Becomes Interim
CFO
This spring, the national office was pleased to welcome James Wad- dell, elder at Trinity Presbyterian Church in Toronto, Ont., as In- terim Chief Financial Officer (CFO) and Treasurer of The Presbyterian Church in Canada. Oliver Ng, the previous CFO, retired on June 30.
James is a Chartered Profes- sional Accountant and recently retired from TMX Group Limited in Toronto. While at TMX, James was the Chief Risk Officer from 2003 to 2012 and the Chief Internal Audi- tor until 2023. The church is very fortunate to be the beneficiary of James’s extensive experience with audits, finance coordination, risk management, implementing ac- countability frameworks, process remediation and governance.
We are very grateful to James for taking on this new role, to the finance department staff for their service, and to everyone for wel- coming James and suppor ting him in the important work he has taken up in the church.
By Chad Rollo, elder and event organizer, University Community Church in Windsor, Ont.
On Saturday, March 25, 2023, University Community Church (UCC) in Windsor, Ont., hosted its very first seminar on sexual- ity. The purpose of this seminar was to have open dialogue about sex and sex education. Church teachings about sex have histori- cally been limited, leading many churchgoers to experience harm, shame and pain related to their sexuality due to a lack of educa- tion and awareness about healthy relationships and safer sex. Even in secular society, there are few spaces where we feel comfort- able talking openly about sex.
As a congregation, we felt it was important to create a safe space to have an open and honest discussion with members of the church and the wider community about sexuality and sex educa- tion—including our perceptions, knowledge, experiences, identi- ties, worries, hopes, expectations and questions.
The seminar was designed around the belief that sex is not a dirty word, and that treating sexuality as a taboo topic pre- vents us from having important conversations. Our hope was to dispel some of the discomfort, shame and fear that surrounds discourse about sexuality and to
generate curiosity and life-giving ways of thinking about the re- alities that humans face as sexual beings. At UCC, we are trying to make a judgement-free space for those who have felt marginalized or excluded by the church, where open and honest conversations can happen.
Local organizations were in- vited to participate, giving pres- ence to available supports and resources in our community, in- cluding the Windsor-Essex Health Unit, Pozitive Pathways, Trans Wellness and the Windsor-Essex Mental Health Association.
In hosting this session and in- viting community partners, we expressed our desire to offer care and cultivate standing par tner- ships in the community to promote healthy and safe sex, whether that be in or out of romantic relation- ships, and acknowledge the vari- ous perspectives on sexual eth- ics and spirituality. Anyone was welcome to attend, regardless of their beliefs or background. Our goal was not to have all the an- swers around sex and sexuality, but rather have a safe space to
provide love, suppor t, resources and shared learning.
The day opened with candid sharingfromfourpanelistsanda moderator.Eachpanelistrespond- ed to the same three questions, of- fering meaningful insights, experi- ences and lessons based on their unique backgrounds, perspectives and stories:
1. What was your sex educa- tion experience growing up like? (church, school, home)
2. What were your expecta- tions of sex? How did that compare to your actual ex- perience?
3. What would you want the next generation to under- stand about sex and sex education?
Following the panel presenta- tion, participants were invited to visit focused table talks, facili- tated by experts in: Sexual Health & Education, Ethics & Spiritual- ity, and Emotional & Relational Health. A nurse, who is a member of University Community Church, brought resources and materials for the first table and answered questions about sexual health. The Rev. Shalini Sankarlal and Dr. Wendy VanderWal Martin fa- cilitated another table for story sharing and questions about eth- ics and spirituality. The emotional and relational health table was hosted by two psychotherapists who presented information and resources, including a robust li- brary of books, and facilitated discussion. A fourth table was set up to allow people to reflect
on and express their thoughts and emotions by colouring, drawing or journaling.
After lunch, we had the honour of listening to a keynote presen- tation by Dr. Wendy VanderWal Martin on sexual ethics. Wendy lives in St. Stephen, N.B., where she serves a three-point Pres- byterian charge. She served as Executive Director of Generous Space Ministries for 20 years, where she developed the con- cept of Centred Set Sexual Ethics. Wendy’s passion for cultivating spaces where diverse people can connect and flourish was evident, and she approached dialogue with compassion and thought- ful contemplation of the dignity of each person and their unique lived experiences.
We ended our day with a “fish- bowl” question and response period, where participants were welcome to submit anonymous questions, and the experts and panelists offered thoughtful re- flections, exploring possible viewpoints and possibilities, and unpacking some of the stigmas of sexuality. Participants responded to and engaged in sex education and awareness that was free of judgement, affirming and appreci- ative of the gifts brought forward by our different identities, experi- ences and learning.
The planning team invited par- ticipants to fill out a feedback survey about their experience of the event. While many expressed that having open conversations about sex in a church setting felt vulnerable or brought up chal- lenging emotions, participants also shared that it felt healing to have these conversations in a judgement-free space. Overall, we heard that members of the community were inspired to con- tinue asking questions and learn- ing together.
Following the success of this first candid conversation about sexuality, the positive outcomes suggest that this seminar may not be the last of its kind to be hosted at UCC!
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Looking for assistance with hosting an event about gender or sexuality?
Carragh Erhardt, Program Coordinator, Sexuality and Inclusion, is available to offer advice to groups in The Presbyterian Church in Canada about hosting educational and community-building opportunities related to gender, sexuality and LGBTQI+ inclusion. Contact Carragh at cerhardt@ presbyterian.ca or 1-800-619-7301 ext. 278.